random thoughts + life updates
been too brain foggy lately to write a proper blog post so this is an assortment of random things going through my mind at the moment.
on existentialism
ever since i've been a kid i've been an existentialist. perhaps why i could never hold down a job. i never wanted to. but the memetic desire in me sees my linkedin feed and wishes i was a manager in a mid sized tech company but i'd probably get bored in a few months.
here today gone tomorrow
i was recently let go from a contract position - kinda my lifeline as i explore the entrepreneurial path. but the last few months it had been slowly chipping away at me...it got too hectic. but i was replaced quickly. funny how that happens. one day you think you are so very important at your job, then you get a reality check the earth will go on rotating without you.
indian families are inherently toxic
toxicity runs in indian society like no other. there is no concept of free will or self. its sad - split among so many line, religion, language and caste. while other societies are actively building towards innovation our youngsters are still fighting for love, inter-caste and inter-religion marriages. approval from their parents and grandparents. i say this as i go through my own cold war with my family who disapprove of my non-indian partner. why? why does my choice have to affect them? i am 29 for god's sake.
on connections
i am a horrible friend. i have to admit that. i suck at keeping in touch. but at the same time most people are not good at being friends as well. two things can be true at the same time. people are inherently selfish. its always about what you can do for them - if you keep giving 99% of the people will keep taking with no remorse. only the 1% will ask you how you are actually doing.
on help
everyone's not out there to help you. people have their own stuff going on. asking for help still doesn't come naturally to me. but i have no choice and so i keep asking and keep facing rejections.
on building
keep moving. keep going. what else are you going to do anyway?